Sunday 31 May 2009

Curiously Compelling

All systems go for the Minion Fest on Friday. Am so excited I can hardly contain myself.

The support from our families and close friends is overwhelming, and the website traffic is looking better than ever. Kitty Moran* came to town today with a box of American cake mix and two jars of frosting for the bakesale. She's staying at the headquarters after the Black Stone Cherry gig at Sin City and she had nothing but the best things to say about them & their support, the wonderfully-named Heaven's Basement. I wasn't there, but she's going to write it up for the zine and from what she's told me, it sounds like an amazing show and I can't wait to read the review. They're touring the UK for the time being, and I'm hoping to score some more interviews for the July/August issue. Kitty likes the idea, but all she really wants are the BSC pants they had at the merch stand. This desire led to an odd brainstorming session -- she had the idea for a series of photos of pants. Not on people, just in weird places. Mailboxes and teapots and such. I've got the teapot, and I find the image of a pair of pants thrown over my tea service curiously compelling. ;)

I can't believe how bright it is. It's 6:11 AM and the sun is in full force over the Headquarters. I'm incredibly awake. Don't think for a second I just woke up -- you know me better than that -- I just haven't been to sleep yet. Who needs sleep when you have inspiration, eh? I'm not entirely sure what's wrong with me, but I'm extremely motivated. It's Monday morning and I've had the weekend off; I'm ready to get on with this magazine business! I don't know if I'll be able to sleep. The ideas keep coming and when they stop, well, I'm about fifty pages away from finishing Chuck Palahniuk's Invisible Monsters and I have to finish it. I was reading it in the kitchen earlier, waiting for water to boil. It's beyond description. I'm crazy about CP's writing. And by writing I don't mean Brad Pitt in Fight Club. I'm just glad it didn't catch on fire over the hob.

Rented Australia last night. I suppose it was the night before last, now. Imagine a western crashes into a WWII movie, cows and bombers flying everywhere, while retaining that touch of stylistic camp that Baz Luhrmann does so well. That was impressive. The characterisation was not. There is NOTHING wrong with Hugh Jackman - believe me, I just saw Wolverine - but the characters were either a) Very Good, or b) Very Bad, and there was no real development. When the prissy English Lady makes out with the rugged Drover, you could believe it with no stretch of the imagination. Voila: two beautiful people kissing sloooowly. Great. Then there's David Wenham, who I love, as the "bad guy". That wasn't so great. I just didn't believe it. His performance was melodramatic and campy (I credit Luhrmann for this); when he threatened people, I giggled. I guess I was just remembering him and Jackman in Van Helsing... maybe he was, too.

Right! The temptation fo the final 50 pages of CP calls! Plus, The Punk has been sleeping for six hours already. He's worn out from an epic stag overnight that involved something called "gorge walking". ??? On his way home this morning - or was it yesterday morning? - he was almost trampled by the thousand women in pink running at him in Bute Park. Granted, he is stupidly sexy, but on this occasion it was for the Race for Life and he stumbled into it with a hangover. Surreal.

Monday 25 May 2009

Will Bake For Toner

Have just spoken to the photocopier guy, and it turns out that the start-up costs of leasing a photocopier with quarterly payments and admin fees are a bit more than I expected. Have worked out the numbers and the photocopier is still the best plan, however, our "small business loan" is too small for a bank, but that's probably a good thing. The plan of attack we've come up with is much more "us" anyway.

We're going to hire a late-night bar, host a bake sale (yes, really), and have our muso friends DJ. Awesome. Now we just need to pick a night...

All of this printing preparation has really dominated business at the Headquarters, and so the June (online) issue is going to come out a little late. It's just as well, really, because I want to use most of the content for the first printed issue of the new series, and it might not help to have the same content online with unlimited availability. I'm still undecided regarding the print/online policy: the general consensus seems to be that if you make the copy available online, no one will buy the magazine (which I don't entirely believe -- the physical object is worth a great deal in and of itself), but I don't want the website to suffer because of this. I'm thinking I'll continue posting things on the website that don't fit in the magazine, like the full transcription of interviews, short stories, my own ramblings, etc. I want the website and the magazine to be able to coexist peacefully, and more than that, to be mutually beneficial.

Obviously no adverts on either. Unless they're fake, of course.

The major issue with the photocopier is location: where are we going to put it? There's already a drum kit next to the desk and there isn't really anywhere else that can go. The Headquarters might be relocating soon, anyway, and that raises to issue of further office space and actual transport for the photocopier.

Regardless of the logistical problems with it, the photocopier is still our best bet for publishing without making a loss or selling ad space. And that's a good thing.

Thursday 21 May 2009

Bikini Girls with Machine Guns

The Universe definitely has a sense of humour.

I was woken up at 10 by a phone call: it wasn't the photocopier guy like I was hoping. The Punk got called into work. So I was up, and not long after I turned on the computer to check my email, my neighbour started BLASTING the Taylor Swift album. And I mean BLASTING -- levels of volume common only to The Punk. I was pretty tempted to blast them into oblivion with some X-Ray Spex, but by the time I was irritated enough to do it, she turned it off. I think her boyfriend came home.

Don't get me wrong: there's nothing funny about Taylor Swift in the morning. Or sober. The funny thing was that instead of inspiring me to choke the hell out of random passers-by (as it usually would), it reminded me that I've got a lot of work to do on The Antagonist if it's going to be done by next week, and part of that work is laying out the article "They Play These Songs in Hell" in which I outline in no uncertain terms what I think of Taylor Swift's "Love Story" as well as bad covers of Halleluiah, anything by The Feeling, and Toto, as well as others.

Bryony came by yesterday for our photo shoot and brought free goodies from the London Book Fair. There's some travel (?) video from the UAE, a book of plays by Mediterranean women, and a bright yellow t-shirt that says "Knowledge Without Borders" in Arabic that I'm pretty sure would get me shot if I tried to wear it through an American airport. We're giving those away in an as yet undetermined contest for the next issue. The rock, I'm keeping. It's pink, a little melty, and it says "Box of Tricks." Thank you, Jeff Phelps and Tindal Street Press. Thank you.

The photo shoot went really well. Jen came over and we made Bryony up like a pin up and had her posing in a number of sexy dresses on my dining room table. It was awesome. We got about 150 good pictures, and I don't think I've ever had a photo shoot of such consistent quality. I told Bryony she ought to get a portfolio together and try modelling -- she looks great! I'm hoping this cover will be the beginning of a series of even better ULTRA covers -- I'm thinking about calling it the "Babes with Brains" series -- where not only are the models (men and women) totally hot, but they're all also remarkably clever. Bryony has her own (ethical) publishing company (The Chameleon Press), is working on a PhD, regularly does work for charities, and I believe has been a member of Mensa for some time. How hot is THAT?



The pictures came out so well that I'm going to have to use them for everything forever now, and I don't know if I'll be able to come up with enough uses for them. Bryony suggested a calendar; she was joking, but don't think it's such a bad idea. I also like the idea of photographing models as our favourite people -- Bryony would make a fabulous Poison Ivy Rorschach.

Now who can I get for NEXT month?

Tuesday 19 May 2009

Lights! Camera! Wall space?

Have a photo shoot scheduled at the Super-Secret Underground Headquarters tomorrow. We have a bag full of bondage-related goodies, fishnets, a hot model, some red lipstick, and a camera. Now all we need is a bare wall.

This is much harder than it sounds. We're either going to have to take down some pictures and move a lot of things around (for the Headquarters is not as big as it ought to be), or invade somebody else's house and do it there. First there's the trouble with wall space, and then there's lighting to consider... still, it should be fun! These things always are!

Have just heard back from Blind Pilot about the interview and have to get some questions to them shortly! Forget transcription, it's coming up with decent questions that's the hard part!

Have just recieved the introduction to the magazine's first ever literary column via email. Hurrah! Have also located copy of InDesign (I haven't installed it on my new computer yet) and have a good week's work ahead of me to lay this sucker out. Still -- everything's so much easier with the new printer! Now if only that guy with the photocopiers would call me back...

PS - Happy Birthday, Linnea x

Sunday 17 May 2009

Laser Printer = Bliss

Was seriously underwhelmed by last night's Counting Crows gig.

The highlight of the evening was Blind Pilot, the first opening band with easily the best sound quality I've heard for a band so low on the bill. They sounded more like a place and time than other bands or genres; I could have told you they were from Oregon before they announced it. I'd probably describe them as folky alt rock with strong bluegrass undertones. They were great, anyway, and they agreed to do an interview for a future issue of the Magazine. Fab!

I was expecting great things from the Hold Steady, but I really didn't get them. I don't think that anybody else did, either. Of course I'm always suspicious of "rock" bands that make a habit of using piano. I know that's not necessarily fair, but it's just one of those things. Still, they're not really rock. I'd call them Avant-garde Hipster Pop. Anyway, the keyboardist kept doing jumping jacks too fast for the songs and the lead singer swayed unbalanced about the stage as if he was on acid and trying to start a fight. First there was the piano, and then there was the talking. He didn't sing so much as talk, and although there's a place and a time for that, it just didn't fit the between the other bands. They probably get that a lot. By the time they played 5 -- count 'em, 5 -- more songs than I thought they should, I'd lost my patience completely. I'm not sure WHAT that was but I'm certainly not in any hurry to listen to it again.

As for the Counting Crows, Jesus. Like I said, I loved the Counting Crows when I was 10, but the novelty's wearing off. I think it must be wearing off for them, too. Granted, it can't be easy playing Mr. Jones night after night for fifteen years. They got that one out of the way straight off, and filled the rest of the set with randomish choices off of the follow-up albums. It wasn't always obvious which ones they were playing when because Adam Duritz spliced lyrics from some songs into others (like Long December/Rain King) and filled the rest of the space with improvisational jazz warbling. He stopped short of launching himself into scat at one point, but that was probably lack of know-how more than self-restraint.

Even though the crowd went mental for everything off of August and Everything After, it became clear that the newly independent Counting Crows were having none of that. People expecting a hits parade of their favourite songs done faithfully would have been very disappointed. The style would have better suited a cafe than the CIA at £33 a pop + booking fee.

The lighting, on the other hand, was fantastic, and the venue was most pleasant.

You know you've got problems when they lighting is the best part.

In other news, the Super Secret Underground Headquarters has a laser printer! Hurrah! We're one step closer to the return of printed copies. This excites me more than anybody else. Still, the more people I share my plot with the more support I get. I've had more offers of monthly columns and stapling/distribution help. Fantastic!

Now if only I could find that copy of InDesign...

Thursday 14 May 2009

Quests Aided by Pleasant Weather

I think all healthy people like to be interviewed. Look at those chain emails and the lists of random questions going around facebook. "Favourite day of the year?" "Biggest pet peeve?" It doesn't matter; people like talking about themselves. It begins in elementary school with the very same lists of questions and continues into adulthood with forwarded emails. I don't think there's anything wrong with that. Peoples' willingness to talk about themselves certainly makes my job easier.

It also helps when people are used to be interviewed. Talking to Rat Scabies yesterday was brilliant. He told me all about the Holy Grail and what makes a good quest ("the weather"), what it was like producing the latest Flipron album (Gravity Calling) and what drives his current recordings. Very interesting stuff! He had no end of nice things to say about Flipron as musicians and as people, and although my interview with Jesse Budd leads me to agree with him, it's still nice to hear good things about a band you're a fan of -- it reaffirms your allegiance. It's rubbish when you find out someone you admire is a tosser.

Take the Killers, for example:

In my first year at Uni, me and all of my friends listened to Hot Fuzz on a loop until I headed back to the States for the summer. I got to see them in Minneapolis with Linnea and Jess H as part of an EPIC road trip that involved a great deal of hysteria and Dairy Queen soft serve. We spent most of the 80 miles from Rochester to St Paul trapped in the worst thunder storm of the summer, me in the front seat trying to calm the driver, Linnea, to the point of not killing us, while Jess H took pictures of the storm from the backseat. Once we escaped the rain we hit the Interstate, which was a completely new adventure for Linnea, and needless to say, when we got to the show we were all feeling pretty lucky to be alive.

The opening band was Louis XIV and the sound quality was appalling. We couldn't hear any of the actual music, but they were so pleasant and looked like they were having so much fun that I went out and bought The Best Little Secrets Are Kept which, although it's mercilessly "influenced" by T Rex and the Kinks, remains a dancing-as-I'm-cleaning-the-house favourite.

Sound-wise, the Killers were fantastic, but it was just like listening to the album in an arena with other people. There was something really joyless about Brandon Flowers' performance that I found terribly dissappointing. I know it must be hard touring for weeks and months at a time, but shit! Afterwards I read an interview they did with the Rolling Stone where he was talking about the shows -- they're shorter than most, and he doesn't enjoy them. I think he described it as "paying their dues."

Again, the Killers' sound quality was superb, but when I think of bands that are exciting to watch, I'm going to think of the UK Subs at Milkwood Jam, or Pour Habit who I recently saw opening for NOFX. Again, the sound quality was not fantastic, but man, were they fun! It's a shame I couldn't get a photo of Chuck scaling the stack. Fantastic!

Madina Lake was surprisingly fun to watch in a weird sort of way. None of them were plugged in to facilitate all of their manic bouncing and twirling. The balloons were a nice touch and well-judged for the age and mood of the audience, and I have to commend Nate for surfing a crowd THAT hormone-ridden. Fair play, dude. That would have scared me.

Next for my adventures I'm reviewing the Counting Crows show in Cardiff on Saturday. My inner ten year old is excited. I played August and Everything After to death in 1994/5. Undecided about the more recent stuff, but I'm sure it'll be a good time.

Either way, you'll hear about it.

Tuesday 12 May 2009

A Photocopier and a Stapler

As usual, I've spent today making plans for the magazine.

Tomorrow I'm interviewing Rat Scabies, and I couldn't be more excited. I'm trying to resist the temptation to read previous interviews because that never helps, it only convinces you that everything's already been asked. Still, I don't feel completely lost going into this one as I have something most music journalists do not: a background in early medieval literature.

Specifically the Arthurian romances of the twelfth and thirteenth centuries. I wasn't sure that would ever come in handy in my life as a journalist, but lo--!

Very excited, and equally chuffed to be working on some questions for Kate Smurthwaite of Cruella Blog. She's a fantastic writer and in this case, the trouble isn't knowing what to ask, it's limiting the questions.

Reading the blog (which I highly recommend) is making me think of the Old Days* with Teen Council and the always inspiring Jess H. In 11th grade I published her practical How-To guide to staging protests, but I never got to use the advice myself. Not long after that, I was in Britain, and it seemed like the issues were less pressing. It was an illusion, of course, but not every issue is as obvious as nearly getting hit by a missile aimed at a Planned Parenthood.

A year ago I covered a pro-choice rally in Cardiff. I thought I'd interview a couple of people and take some pictures, but I ended up hijacking the microphone and following a crowd of like-minded people to the police station to complain when a photographer was taken into custody for taking pictures of the event. Naturally, everyone took pictures of the arrest, and that's the great thing about Citizen Journalism. Everybody's got a camera.

There are a lot of great things about Citizen Journalism, but I don't have to tell you that. The Antagonist owes everything to self-publishing. And what's wrong with that? Do investors and advertisers make something worthwhile? If anything, they invalidate a publication/station/object by compromising its interests and creating a dependency on approval. That's not healthy. Much better to say what you've got to with a stapler and a photocopier.

*2003